Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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