she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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