i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Randomize
