It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
