I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
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