Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Randomize
