You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
