Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
