it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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