i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Randomize
