ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
