Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Randomize