Where is the hickey?
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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