Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
