You're a womanizer and a bitch.
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
