Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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