if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
