Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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