the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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