I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize