Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
too bad you live with your parents still
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
