Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Randomize