i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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