I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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