Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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