you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
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