He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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