I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
