The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
This house was built for laser tag.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Randomize
