I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
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