You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
