Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
