I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize