Buhtt sex?
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
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