It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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