Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Randomize
