Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize