How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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