And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
