He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
