I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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