i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
