If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
My vagina is officially offended.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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