I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize