she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
