so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
