There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
