It's just like the Real World with babies
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
