He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
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