Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
